


Tips For The Care And Feeding Of Grumpy Professors

by telperion_15



Category: Primeval
Genre: Established Relationship, Fluff, Humor, M/M, Office Sex, Pre-Canon, University
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-02-12
Updated: 2012-02-12
Packaged: 2017-10-31 00:31:41
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,402
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/337933
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/telperion_15/pseuds/telperion_15
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>There are many ways to keep your professor happy.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Tips For The Care And Feeding Of Grumpy Professors

**Author's Note:**

> Originally written as a birthday fic for kristen_mara.

**1\. A caffeinated professor is a happy professor**  
  
Stephen could hear Cutter’s grumbling from the kitchenette, even above the clattering of teaspoons and the noise of the kettle as it came closer to the boil. He smiled to himself as he slopped the hot water into two mugs, stirred them both vigorously, and then carried them out into the main office.  
  
“Here,” he said, shoving one under Cutter’s nose. “You sound like you could do with this.”  
  
Cutter looked at the mug of coffee for a split second, and then grabbed it and started guzzling it down with an expression normally reserved for those who had won the lottery.  
  
The mug was more than half empty before he looked about at Stephen again. “You’re my hero, you know that?” he said, and pulled Stephen down into a distinctly coffee-flavoured kiss.  
  
“Least I could do,” Stephen replied, when he was able.  
  
“It was those bloody second year essays,” Cutter muttered. “Kept me up most of the night.”  
  
“Well, you shouldn’t have left them until the last minute then, should you?” said Stephen, unable to resist.  
  
Cutter scowled, and Stephen delivered the second blow. “And you know you’ve still got another stack to do, right? The ones on top of the filing cabinet that you forgot about?”  
  
“What?” Cutter looked despairing, and then sighed in defeat, waving his now empty mug at Stephen. “I guess you’d better get me a top up, then.”  
  
  
 **2\. Keeping students away can be beneficial to his health, and theirs.**  
  
Stephen walked into Cutter’s office to find Cutter frowning distractedly at something on his computer screen.  
  
“Morning,” he said. “Did I just see Anna McLaughlin coming out of here on my way in?”  
  
“What? Oh, yes. She was here a few minutes ago.”  
  
“Was she _crying_ when you were talking to her?”  
  
Cutter frowned. “I don’t think so…”  
  
“Because she definitely was when I passed her. What on earth did you say to her, Cutter?”  
  
“Er…” Cutter looked slightly lost. “We were just going through her last essay.”  
  
“And…?”  
  
“I told her what she needed to do to improve for the next one,” Cutter said impatiently. “Nothing she didn’t need to hear.”  
  
“And I suppose you were your usual charming self, were you?”  
  
“You mollycoddle those students too much, Stephen. Sometimes they need tough love.”  
  
“There’s tough love, and then there’s giving them a nervous breakdown.” Stephen rolled his eyes. “I’d better email Anna, try and head her off before she complains to the dean or something.”  
  
“She won’t complain to anyone,” Cutter said. He grimaced. “No one seems to appreciate that these students might give _me_ a nervous breakdown, you know.”  
  
Stephen snorted with laughter. “You don’t see them enough for them to give you a nervous breakdown,” he said.  
  
Cutter stuck his tongue out at him.  
  
  
 **3\. Ditto for authority figures**  
  
“Honestly, why is the queue in the refectory always so _long?_ ” Cutter grumbled, waving his arms around to emphasise his displeasure. “And how do we always end up at the back of it?”  
  
“Because we’re on a university campus containing several thousand students, all of whom apparently want to eat their lunch at the same time as you,” Stephen told him, hiding his amusement under a deadpan expression.  
  
Cutter glowered at him. “Ha, ha, very funny,” he said. “You’d need to start thinking about lunch almost as soon as you’d finished breakfast to avoid that lot…oof!”  
  
He came to an abrupt stop as Stephen suddenly flung out an arm in front of him.  
  
“Stephen, what are you doing?”  
  
Stephen nodded down the corridor towards Cutter’s office. Standing outside the closed door, his back to them (but clearly checking his watch impatiently), was the dean.  
  
“Bugger,” muttered Cutter succinctly.  
  
“Do you have a meeting with him this afternoon?” Stephen whispered.  
  
“No. But since when has that ever stopped him trying to corner me?”  
  
“He hasn’t seen you yet. You could make a break for it.”  
  
Cutter sighed, in a rather martyred fashion. “We can’t just leave him there.”  
  
“I’ll take care of it,” Stephen said.  
  
Cutter’s eyebrows shot up. “Really. You’d do that?”  
  
“Of course.” Then Stephen grinned. “You are going to owe me big time, though.”  
  
“Anything,” Cutter promised. “Anything at all.”  
  
“I’ll hold you to that,” Stephen replied cheekily. “Now get going, before he turns round and sees you.”  
  
“Thank you,” Cutter hissed, and then started retreating rapidly the way they’d come.  
  
Stephen walked forward. “Good afternoon, Professor,” he said, as Cutter disappeared around the corner. “Can I help you with something?”  
  
The dean scowled. “Where’s Cutter?”  
  
“At a seminar.”  
  
“Seminar?” The dean eyed Stephen suspiciously. “There’s nothing listed on his timetable for right now.”  
  
“Impromptu revision session,” Stephen fabricated smoothly. “We didn’t put it on the timetable, sorry.” He unlocked the office door and invited the dean inside. “However, I’m sure I can help you out. Now, what do you need?”  
  
“Several things, actually…”  
  
Cutter was _definitely_ going to owe him for this.  
  
  
 **4\. Paperwork and professors don’t mix**  
  
There was no other way to describe it – Cutter’s office looked like several bombs had hit it.  
  
Cutter himself was standing in the middle of the carnage, looking like he was about to start tearing his hair out at any second. But although the sight was rather a comical one, Stephen felt no desire to laugh.  
  
“What the hell happened in here?” he demanded. “No, wait, don’t tell me, you were ambushed by a posse of students. Or perhaps Doris the cleaning lady has finally decided to take her revenge on you.”  
  
“Stephen, you have to help me,” said Cutter desperately. “That grant proposal, the one we just finished…”  
  
“You mean the one we worked _all_ weekend on?” said Stephen, beginning to have an inkling of where this was going.  
  
“Yes! That one!”  
  
“What about it?”  
  
“I can’t _find_ it! It needs to be in the post by today in order to meet the deadline, and it’s completely vanished!”  
  
Now Stephen did laugh. His chuckles caused extreme confusion and extreme displeasure to cross Cutter’s face in quick succession.  
  
“It’s not _funny_ , Stephen! This is a disaster.”  
  
“Relax, Cutter.” Stephen picked his way across the room towards a protesting, spluttering Cutter and steered him towards his chair, before pushing him down into it and starting to massage his shoulders.  
  
“Relax,” he said again. “I posted it this morning.”  
  
  
 **5\. A well-timed blow-job can work wonders**  
  
Stephen let Cutter’s spent cock slip from his lips, and unselfconsciously wiped away a dribble of come that had escaped his mouth with the back of his hand.  
  
Then he looked up at Cutter, and couldn’t help but smirk at the somewhat vacant look on the other man’s face.  
  
“Oi.” He nudged at Cutter’s knee, and then again, more forcefully, when Cutter didn’t immediately respond.  
  
Cutter finally looked down at him, his eyes still glazed.  
  
“You with us?” Stephen asked cheekily.  
  
“What?” mumbled Cutter. “I…oh, yes.”  
  
“Good, because I’d hate to think I just sucked out _all_ your brain cells through your cock.”  
  
Cutter blushed at that – which was stupid considering his recent, and obvious, enjoyment of their activities – and started tucking himself back inside his jeans.  
  
“After all,” Stephen continued, “you’re going to need them to deal with the students in your eleven o’clock seminar.”  
  
Cutter’s gaze darted to the clock, which proudly proclaimed it was 10:55am. “Oh, come on, Stephen,” he protested. “I’m in no fit state to deal with a bunch of first years after that!”  
  
“Uh uh, Cutter, that was the deal, remember?” Stephen said. “One blow-job in exchange for you actually taking a seminar for once.”  
  
“But you’re so much better with them,” Cutter wheedled. “They barely even know what I look like!”  
  
Stephen stood up, bent over, and kissed Cutter quickly on the lips. “Then you’d better give them an opportunity to learn, hadn’t you?” he said.  
  
“But Stephen…”  
  
“Sorry, Cutter, a deal’s a deal.”  
  
“Oh, _fine_ ,” Cutter muttered. He stood up too, grabbed a sheaf of papers that he’d discover were the wrong ones about five minutes after the seminar started, and flounced out of the office.  
  
Stephen smirked again, and then plonked himself down in the chair Cutter had just vacated, snagging a newspaper and propping his feet up on the desk. It wasn’t often that Cutter’s schedule allowed him an hour off, and he was determined to enjoy it.


End file.
